"<p>I didn't know what the future had in store for me. For weeks I was tormented by anger and bitterness, and then lethargy followed. Have you ever been at sea in a thick fog, when you felt as if you were surrounded by that almost palpable gray darkness, when the big, heavy ship groped its way towards the shore restlessly and excitedly with the gauge, and you waited with a pounding heart to see what would happen next? ? I was like that ship, with the difference that I didn't have a compass or sound signal, and I didn't know how far there was to shore.</p>"